Your current relationship. If single, discuss how single life is.
So.. I don't know if talking about this will get me in trouble or not. Haha!
Well, I guess it's a known fact which guy my heart belongs to in this world; I say this world because ultimately, it's God, but that's a whole other story. We're taking things easy, enjoying the days as they come, becoming better friends, better people to each other, and hopefully to the people around us as well. Growing and learning together. I never really had a problem being single before all this, and I don't know if this makes me seem conceited, but I know for a fact that was a strong girl standing on my own, although that's not to say I never had family to lean on when I needed them. But things change, people change. I saw what it was like to be with someone, to have someone holding your hand through life stuff, a partner who doesn't walk before you or behind you, but rather beside you. He who looks out for you and looks at you the way no one ever has, who sees beauty in the world and in you when you can't see it for yourself. Who always is honest and frank, bluntly telling you things you do not want to hear, because that's just how it is with you guys, and who always wants you to become better, even when it hurts. He who tries to get to know your family and have them fall in love with him, too, who you know is in it with you through the thickest or thinnest of times. Who makes you cry and laugh, who you can be absolutely silly with and not worry about looking ridiculous in front of, someone with whom you can just sit in comfortable silence with.
First, I never meant to fall in love with him, that's the most honest truth I can say. And secondly, when I did, I tried so hard to not be. It started out that we detested each other when we were kids, but met again years later and found we could actually be friends. From then on, it was all up; he became a really good friend turned best friend if only minus the tension. And I prayed, in the craziest and most annoying way: if it wasn't to be, then don't let it be, but if He was God's best, then hey, bring it on, let him fall in love with me. Take note, this prayer was way before I fell for him, but at the time when we were becoming great pals and I was just slowly starting to see the qualities that made him likable beyond just friends.
Being single isn't all that bad--in fact, it may even be for some people to be strong alone for life--although it's probably a state that's harder to go back to now if you've known what it was like to walk with someone beside you.
I can honestly say though, that while I have very sure and strong feelings, I don't know where all this is heading. I can pray, wish, beg, but still I don't know; God knows I wish I did. It hasn't been easy--WE'VE BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH!! Ultimately though, it's His plan. But an assurance I take refuge in is, He knows my heart :)
I LOVE this video!!
So Rainy sent it to me a while ago with the instructions to "JUST WATCH IT!!!" (cause I tend to ask a lot of questions like "Why?" "What's that?" "What for?"), and while watching it, I thought, that is so him!!! Haha he admits it, the big kid :p
Wasn't expecting much of turning twenty-five yesterday, and after a sudden unfortunate change of events, I was even more down and not in any way looking forward to anything. Add to that my limited list of food I could eat because of a sudden attack allergies. Phooey, right?
Woke up early in the morning to get ready, my mom and Josh drove me up to the mountains to meet up with friends for a couple of friends' wedding. Beautiful weather, amazing time. Took a little stop at Starbucks for some coffee and sandwiches, then had a lovely ride down with Rainy. Surprised when he brought me to Lugang, knowing I have been wanting to have good 小龙包 for a long time already--really good food, but more than the food, it was the thought he put into it. He held back on the food, ordering the good stuff but making sure those didn't contain any allergy-triggering ingredients; Rain wanted to get me cake too, but knew I couldn't. And knowing me best, we got tea to go, knowing it would cap off the great day we had perfectly :)
Thanks for spending my birthday with me, I know it's not easy to make time sometimes, but I loved it :)
Got home in the afternoon to a poor, sick sister :( played with my baby cousin and hung with the sister
and Skyped in the evening :)
Real laid-back day, but it was incredible <3
I am blessed, very happy, content :) this is the perfect way to begin the next twenty-five years of life :)
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Twenty-five years ago today, a baby boy was born. So he probably had pale white skin (which women of today envy and spend tons of money on products that would make them even the teeniest bit nearly as white as him) and adorable, crinkly Chinese eyes. I'm sure he cried and made a fuss a lot ;)
Twenty-five years later, still the same silly face with the same cute eyes :) and I can attest to the fact that he still fusses around like a girl too haha
When people ask how long I've known him, I never really know what to say; technically, I've known him since we were little kids in Sunday school--back then, we did not like each other at all. I thought he was loud and obnoxious and such a typical immature boy, he saw me as a quiet, uptight snob. We saw each other a lot, too much then, to appreciate it. Guess it was partly due to that adolescent phase when girls think, "Boys, ugh," and boys think, "Girls, yuck!" Lost touch when we hit high school, I think, but reconnected when we were both abroad in Beijing for post-uni studies. Honestly I was surprised he remembered me, cause like I said, we near-detested each other's guts back then (right? Right??). But this was different. I found him to have changed, he seemed to have matured, while I was in the process of changing as well. What especially drew me to him was how the goodness of his heart shone without him trying, how he seemed to have such a heart for other people :)
VERY long story made short, we became friends, very good friends, best friends, who've been through pretty much anything and everything together. So many firsts. Silly stuff, serious stuff, fun stuff, heartbreaking stuff. Bike races through Beijing streets, pigging out on meat-all-you-can hotpot lunches just us two, cheap street food dinners, studying at Bridge, ridiculous pillow fights, staying in for the weekend just watching TV series and ordering delivery, going out for midnight snacks in the dead of Beijing winter, existing in the city we love, milk tea dates back home, being yoga buddies, acting as my chauffeur, just chill weekend partners, and so so much more. Through it all, there's only been two things, learning and living, together. It's the most amazing thing to have someone who gets you, who nudges you to be better, to be able to sit in comfortable silence with someone and not have to worry about saying something wrong, to be able to be at your silliest and craziest with him without being judged, to be able to tell him everything and know that he's there and not going anywhere.
I remember a year ago, I wrote him a long birthday email, and ended up making us both cry. Of course, things were different then. He was in Beijing and I was stuck here. Not the ideal way to celebrate someone important's birthday apart. Which is why I'm thankful for this year, I got to spend it with him, even if it was in advance. And even then, when the day was supposed to be special and about him, HIS day, he turned the tables on me and made it about me too. That's just how good he is. Deep down, it's there, even if he shows a manly, tough exterior sometimes :)
So much has happened--time, distance, drama, issues. But we've gotten through them. At least most of them ;) we're works in progress, but I believe He who began this good work in us will be faithful to complete it :)
Thanks, Rainy, for everything. Thank you for teaching me, bearing with me, standing by me and loving me. You know what I'm talkin about :) and you know I've always got your back, no matter what, where, when, how, how long. If you're sad, I cry with you, and when you're happy, I'm even happier for you. Even if it is just me, at least you've got me :) you are superduper loved <3
xoxo
Paupau
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